Be afraid. Be very afraid.
The good news: this has been resolved down to one suitcase, one carry-on, and my backpack.
The bad news: the suitcase weighs around ninety pounds.
Boy and girls, the day is here. I'm actually sitting in the Sioux Falls airport getting ready to fly out. Wow.
It's been a very hectic week for me. I finished up work at the hospital which was great (my lovely coworkers even gave me a good luck card!) I visited a number of family and friends in the last few days, got a lot of hugs, and managed to cry only once when I said good bye to my parents. I left my brother's house in the twin cities on Monday night, and even though I started saying my hard good byes that night, it didn't really hit until the next day. And it really hit. The next six and a half months of my life will be out of the country in a culture radically different than my own.
Don't get me wrong; I'm excited! Ever since studying abroad in England last fall, I've had an itch to go abroad again, and it was actually there that God first put the idea on my heart to do something like this one day. It's been a while since I've worked with kids, and I'm super excited to do it again. I even get to stop by England for a few days on the way to Tanzania and back to visit my friends!
I think the best way I can explain it is through a devotional I read a while ago:
"Great acts of faith are seldom born out of calm calculation. It wasn't logic that caused Moses to raise his staff on the bank of the Red Sea. It wasn't medical research that caused Naaman to dip seven times in the river. It wasn't common sense that caused Paul to abandon the law and embrace grace. And it wasn't a confident committee that prayed in a small room in Jerusalem for Peter's release from prison. It was a fearful, desperate, backed into a corner believers. It was a church with no options. A congregation of have-not's pleading for help.
"And never were they stronger. At the beginning of every act of faith, there is often a seed of fear."
If that last line is true, then, honestly, the last few days I have been one of the most faithful people around. I wasn't backed in a corner in the way many of the people in these situations were, but I've been confused. My human eyes can't see what God can, and I've been frustrated over it. I've asked him so many times in the last few days why he's called me to do this, and the truth is I still don't know yet. But God is there. On the day I needed it most, I am sitting here, yes scared, yes slightly overwhelmed, anxious about luggage/security/London/and all the in betweens, but blessed with his peace. All those other things are present and need to be addressed, but they're not my focus. God is, and I know he's leading the way, exactly as it should be. :)
As I said earlier, I'm going to England for a few days. I'm actually leaving for Tanzania on Monday at three in the afternoon central time. Until then, please keep me in your prayers for safe travels, especially for the international travel!
God bless,
Kjirstin
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